Wedding planning can be stressful. You have the perfect venue to find, photographer to meet, dress to fall in love with – it can be quite overwhelming. The people around you during your engagement can be the make or break of you. Some are truly amazing and some are pure zillas at heart.
-zilla [‘zi,lə] – suffix placed on a noun to denote subject’s overbearing need to have a strong, unyielding and often unreasonable opinion on absolutely f***ing everything. Commonly used in the context of wedding planning.
Though brides are usually the victims of being named a zilla, in my experience the real zillas come in all shapes and sizes. The bride is usually one of the poor people who suffer the wrath of this person. So I want to arm you with the fact about zillas so you can spot them early and prevent them from taking over.
Photo by Beatrici Photography
Grooms are famous for their gentle nods of agreement about the wedding theme or an enthusiasm about the food but Groomzillas are a league of their own. Incredibly sneekily they’ll take charge of where money is allocated, the layout of the day and make certain demands that may not gel with your plans. If your groom insists on having a flaming red Ferrari California Convertible as your wedding car despite the limited space and the wind messing up your hair, you have a groomzilla on your hands.
Save yourself: I am all for grooms being a part of the wedding process and actively encourage it. Remind your hubby-to-be that it’s a shared day; compromise is key. Give your partner a few wedding related tasks to handle so you both feel part of the team.
Photo by Adam Riley
Don’t you just love them! Your maids have been brimming with ideas from the moment you showed them the ring. However perhaps one of your close maids it getting a little too pushy. Maybe she is complaining about the bridesmaid’s dress you bought her or disagrees with the rest of the group about your hen. All of her sentences begin with ‘I don’t want to…’, ‘You shouldn’t…’, ‘If it were me I would…’ – it’s driving you mad!
Save yourself: No one likes a bitter bridesmaid so if you spot this early have a little chat. Kindly say that as your close friend, you value their opinion dearly and want them to be a part of their special day but that at it’s core, it is your wedding day and you’d appreciate their support. If things continue to get worse and she is ruining the experience for you then boot her from the bridesmaids camp.
Photo by Adam Riley
Most Mums and Dads are supportive from beginning to end perhaps adding in their little tips and tricks. However they can get a little overbearing with their demands – particularly if they are footing the bill. They may insist on certain guests you’ve never met being invited to the wedding breakfast or disapprove of your untraditional approach. But how can you argue with your parents?
Save yourself: This is tricky but start by letting them know that you appreciate every bit of input. Perhaps compromise on some aspects of the wedding but nothing that will make you unhappy or feel as if you’re losing control of your wedding day. Most importantly never feel pressured to invite anyone you haven’t met!
Photo by Phil Drinkwater
You start to toss and turn about the font on your stationery being too bold and want it all reprinted. You ask your bridesmaids to dye their hair bright purple to suit the wedding theme. You make sure your hubby-to-be is on a strict regime of exercise and a carb free diet to slim into his new suit. Boom we’re in Bridezilla town.
Save yourself: Preventing your own Bridezillanation could be the most valuable thing of all. Sure weddings are a rush of decisions and you want things to be perfect but it’s worth remembering to let the little things go to keep yourself in check. The blushing bride is all the more lovely to be around when she is open to ideas, reasonable with her requests and approaches her wedding with excitement and care.
That’s it! Hope this little article helps you. Have you suffered from any of the zillas mentioned here? Do you feel yourself becoming a zilla? Let me know – I’d love to hear from you!
Ta ta for now!